my mother called me at 9 oclock this morning to tell me about what a fuck up i am in life. she also called to tell me how much more of a fuck up i could have been if she hadn't 'saved' me. saved me from what? myself? i don't know if she realizes that i'm running away from her -- have been running away from her. that the reason that i don't call isn't because i'm busy, but because i don't miss her.
i feel heartless. i'm not one bit homesick.
i hate the way i feel after talking to her. it's the feeling that i'm an inconvenience to the world. this, coming from the person who bore me. yeah, it's a pretty awful feeling.
You know what? My going away to college and moving away from home actually help me learn to get along with my mom. She used to harrass and nag me to no end, and she still does, but now I can turn it around and joke with her about her persistent worrying. I never thought I'd be able to just kick it with her, but now we can chill, drink beers, and talk. I guess it's useless hearing this now, but hopefully, it'll all work itself out eventually. Now, I've come to realize that my parents are actually really funny and weird!
Posted by Michelle @ 10/25/2001 07:55 PM PST
It feels good to say that rather than ball it all inside doesnt it?
