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20021025

:)

I can't say that I'm happy all the time these days... I don't think that would be very realistic. What I can tell you, though, is I've felt a 100% improvement since I began taking my medication regularly again. It's not like it makes me any smarter or it gives me super powers or anything (though it would be cool if it did), but I feel more like the way I like myself to be more than before. I'm not as scared and I feel less bogged down, even though I'm taking on even more responsibilities than before.

I have the feeling in my mind that I want to express myself. I've been trying a variety of things... drawing, sewing -- I even learned how to knit yesterday! For some reason, though, I keep coming back to writing.

A few days ago, I went through all my old journal entries from two years ago. Though they're less polished, less thought out than some of my more recent entries... they have something that my newer entries are lacking. Perhaps it's the lack of obligation... perhaps it was the fact that friends didn't used to read. Maybe just grew up. I can't tell.

What I do know is that my habit for writing isn't going to give up that easily. My fingers still twitch, eager to spill my thoughts -- though, these days I don't have much to complain about (which has always been a big topic in the past, in case you didn't know)... But I'm sure I'll eventually find another writing niche that I enjoy.

Until then, you'll just have to deal with reading about my daily goings-ons.

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Posted by Kim @ 12:35 AM PST

12 have spoken

i think it's ballsy that you let your friends in on your site. i never let them know. it's my public/private outlet. i want to be able to say what i want even it means pissing off a friend.

Posted by never @ 11/12/2002 06:59 PM PST

i think it's ballsy that you let your friends in on your site. i never let them know. it's my public/private outlet. i want to be able to say what i want even it means pissing off a friend.

Posted by never @ 11/12/2002 06:59 PM PST

Am I your only British reader? Do you think sometimes that you're too intense and that maybe you should take up an outside interest? Lots of luck to you anyway in whatever you choose to do xxx

Posted by Emily [e-meo] @ 11/01/2002 05:21 AM PST

hey kim?
do you remember trevor rice? from your high school?? hes my roomate.. he says wassup.. i was talking to him about your site when he told me what high school he was from.. haha what a coincidence? i go to sjsu btw... anyway.. hey.. i totally agree with you in never escaping the writing.. whenever my mind wants to release.. writing has been the only way to relieve me.. its weird.. i just get paper.. or my notebooks and i start writing.. usually its poetry.. but i keep journals too.. my newest one was stolen =\.. but yea.. i feel ya on that writing thing.. writings my remedy.. it makes thing make sense.. it listens to me when no one can... yea.. keep up the good work!

Posted by jeck [e-meo] [virtual dwelling] @ 10/30/2002 12:41 AM PST

Hoooorah! For Kim!

Posted by Vanessa [virtual dwelling] @ 10/26/2002 12:49 PM PST

Hoooorah! For Kim!

Posted by Vanessa [virtual dwelling] @ 10/26/2002 12:48 PM PST

got here thru a friend

how come hot girls, or any girls for that matter, can't get all worked up about engineering and grace us w/ their presence in the ece classes? it's a huge sausage-fest in ece31. while ics51, on the other hand, is packed with females...sigh...

great site btw, madpimp.com haha
too good, too good

be happy, there's no upside to not being happy heh

Posted by poody @ 10/25/2002 03:36 PM PST

I love the site re-design.

I have always found that if there isn't enough to complain about in my life it's usually my fault.

Posted by Wilde [e-meo] [virtual dwelling] @ 10/25/2002 01:00 PM PST

This is nice.
And it doesn't look too bad in Mozilla either.

I want to buy a new winter coat.

Posted by eyekyu [e-meo] @ 10/25/2002 09:27 AM PST

New layout new layout new layout new layout!!! People can you hear me? Lookies, new layout!!

Posted by Kris @ 10/25/2002 05:32 AM PST

you know what sucks about college? they make you think too much. 99% of the fun stuff i did in college was without any thought what-so-ever, total impulse. and that's what you gotta do. just let go sometimes. dont look back and dont look forward...just live it up in the moment.

and i know that's easier said then done, especially since i went to uci and know the experience. you know what it was like being a white guy in a school of 13,000 asians??? actually is was pretty fun. but what really sucked was working 2 jobs while everyone else got free money from their families, and lets not forget everyones $35k car. thank gawd genetics gave me the upper hand in other departments (ah yeah). but i can look back at those days and think, damn, my ass did absolutely nuthing but work hard and study harder just to be outdone and shown up by some rich kids or i can look back and say hey, i had some pretty damn good times back then.

all im tryin to say is that life is all about how you view things. perspective is almost as important as experiences. just live it up, you'll have plenty of times to look back when you're older and contemplate and try to comprehend everything. everyday is another chance to change things for the better.

oh yeah, if you ever make it down to the clone factory do me a favor and tell the phi sig management there brian says get a real job!!! hahahah sorry, that was just some therapy for me.

take care

Posted by brian @ 10/25/2002 03:49 AM PST

oh shiet yu logged... teh heh... yea ok... anywayz... no to provoke anytyng... but ai do come in yer site regularly tah see if yu logged...

no we don't kno each other... ai jez find it interesting to get an insight on otha peeplz daily lyvz... jez anotha person passin by dat waz caught in a web yah kno...

so wether yu say anytyng meanin full or sumpin gay... dun matter... lyk yu sed... yu yearn fer it more dan yu tynk... an uh... yeap...

Posted by dat bastard wolf @ 10/25/2002 01:11 AM PST